Sue Brace: “Time heals… but we will never forget”

Posted on May 28, 2014 | Category :Uncategorized | No Comments

Sue Brace 2

WELL it won’t be long before the Survivors’ weekend in July – and looking at how busy the survivors’ committee has been, it’s going to be a busy weekend for them.

We forget that the Survivor Committee is made up of survivors doing their best in organising your events. Whilst you are all there at the weekend remembering your loved one, these survivors have just snatches of remembering.

More from Sue Brace, president of Care of Police Survivors here.

The Survivor Committee don’t complain, especially when they know sometimes they don’t get things right. But they want to make a difference to the charity that has given them the sense that they can accomplish whatever they want to accomplish.

It’s giving something back to the charity and to help new survivors.

By serving as trustees, committee members or volunteers these survivors rediscover meaning in their lives and often discover skills and talents in themselves which had been forgotten. It gives them back their confidence.

But more importantly it gives them a sense of achievement and a proudness that they are part of this big family. To enable COPS to grow we need survivors either as volunteers, or committee members. If you feel you want to know more please don’t hesitate in getting in touch with Heather Cooper or Abbie Clark.

As I have said in the past this is your charity if you want to make a difference then get on board.

I was asked recently how long ago it was when my sister Cheryl Lloyd died and I have to say the answer took me by surprise. It’s 9 years this June. The question next was how are we coping after so long? I know from other families some of us cope ok, we tend to keep busy.

We find ourselves taking care of others, being strong and just surviving each day.

But the reality is we don’t allow ourselves to deeply grieve or mourn. But also that does not mean we don’t have occasional times of deep pain and sadness. But I do find we are good at saying to ourselves “pick yourself up and get on with your life.”

That is what our loved ones would want us to do.

However nothing prepares us for that grief to sneak up upon us several years after our loss. It hits you like a brick. It may be difficult to share your feelings with others because they thought you are coping ok. They won’t understand and how can you bring up your grief now after so long. For some of us this delayed grief is part of our journey.

At Care of Police Survivors we do not have to go through this alone, there is always a helping hand. Someone to listen and help support you.

We will never be alone as we have such great support system in COPS.


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